Bad Leg Week


On Saturday, I was sorting things out in the loft. I decided to wear shoes to protect my feet in the loft. Wise move, eh?

I was at the stage where I was moving a lot of stuff in and out of the loft and through the house. Rather than repeatedly put my shoes on and off, I just left them off. It was at that point that I dropped a large block of wood, which bounced off my unprotected right big toe.

I don’t know if you’ve ever dropped a heavy object onto your toe from a great height, but it’s rather an unpleasant sensation. Oddly, the first thing that you feel is heat. There’s a scream of all sorts of sensations and you’re left in no doubt as to the fact that something has hurt you a lot, but when you look past the cacophony of signals, the dominant initial one is heat.

So, I’m in the loft, and a second or so after the ‘drop’, I’m hopping and waiting to see how much pain I’m in. Yup, it’s a bad one. Wave after wave of toe pain. If it wasn’t for the pain, I’d imagine it would have been funny to see me hopping around the loft. I bumble my way down the loft ladder and remove the sock. Interesting. My big toe has gone blue.

Here is an accurate recreation of the moment it happened:

Toe

A Medal

Now (two days later), my toe is so gruesome that I’m not prepared to share a picture of it. It looks like a toe from Shaun of the Dead. My kids seem magnetically attracted to my toe, bumping into it continuously. I should get a medal for not swearing in front of them in the last 48 hours.

I suppose I should point out the context for this accident was that it happened immediately before my wife and two of my daughters had a vomiting bug. Between them chucking up and me hobbling around, we looked like a right sickly mob.

I know you’ll all be anxious to know what’s happening with my toe over the next couple of days. Will the nail come off? (Likely) Will the toe drop off? (I bloody hope not) If there is enough demand, I’ll set up @PostmansToe on Twitter and Instagram. There’ll be copycat accounts shortly after, I imagine. (I am joking, by the way.)

A pretty rubbish Bank Holiday weekend, all in all!

9 Comments

  1. 29 May 2017
    Reply

    Oh no!! That sounds awful, but you definitely deserve a medal for not swearing in front of the little ones ???????? Hope it heals up soon xx

  2. 29 May 2017
    Reply

    OMG poor you. It’s crazy isn’t it that when you have an injury you seem to knock or drop things onto that area – sods law. Arnica tablets are great for helping with bruising, sounds like you may need to stock up. Stay safe x

  3. 29 May 2017
    Reply

    Arghhhh I feel your pain! I am the accident prone queen so I know what it’s like to be laid up with a self inflicted injury. Rest well and feel better soon.

  4. 29 May 2017
    Reply

    Oh dear that sounds awful! I do feel for you with the toe it is agony! As for hurting your knee whilst playing tricks on your wife … haha xx

  5. Ogh no, so sorry to hear that! But you are better than I, I totally would of swore my head off lol!

  6. 29 May 2017
    Reply

    Ouch Ouch Ouch your poor leg/foot but then again at least you admit that it was karma lol. Still though poor you!

  7. 30 May 2017
    Reply

    Oh no, what a nightmare. I feel your pain – I have arthritis in my foot and people seem magnetically drawn to it and tread on my poor inflammed toes – hope you are feeling better soon

  8. 4 June 2017
    Reply

    Sounds like you’ve been through the wars! Poor you, hope it gets better soon x

  9. 4 June 2017
    Reply

    Oh gosh that sounds awful. Hope you get some relief soon!

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